Saying Goodbye to Cameroon

Getting the cars ready for the sail!

Exactly 1 year and 6 days ago, I first arrived in Cameroon. It’s hard to believe all that has happened, all the adventures, laughter, mistakes made, lessons learned, friendships created. All the people I am closest with now, I hadn’t even met them yet. The person I was then, isn’t the person I am now. Looking back and seeing all the things God brought me through is incredible. It certainly wasn’t an easy year but I was blessed to do it alongside some amazing people, to be pushed and challenged to pursue God even when it was a desert season, to learn to heal from long ago hurts, to experience new ones and get back up anyway. And while I may be ready to leave Cameroon, I’m not sure I’m ready to leave Mercy Ships. I have 25 days left on this wonderful Ship. 25 days to be present and intentional and to pour out as much love as I possibly can. Don’t get me wrong, I’m incredibly excited for this next season. I’m excited to be home and part of my family’s everyday life, to learn new things, to see what God has next for me. But I’m also mourning the loss of this place, a safe place to learn and grow, a place to see Godly families and relationships modeled, a place where I am known, a place where almost every day I can see the tangible ways we are changing lives. I think this is the inevitable struggle of transitioning from something amazing and wonderful and good to something that will also be amazing and wonderful and good.

These are some of the amazing men who keep us safe.

I have definitely been struggling and the countless goodbyes haven’t made it any easier. Imagine if your whole town or church left inside a two or three week period…that’s kind of what the last few weeks have felt like. The goodbyes are coming fast and furious now and it’s been rough. Bosses, spiritual leaders, friends, community leaders, acquaintances…everyone has an impact on you. This is my first time fully finishing off a field service (I left early in Mada to do onboarding, and in Benin I left for Advance), and I’m so glad I haven’t had to experience this every year. I couldn’t do it. I don’t know how people do this every field service, over and over. This is absolutely stretching my newly learned vulnerability. How do you not put all your walls up and shut the world out when there are so many emotions and feelings tied up in seeing people leave? 

Before Michele left, we went for one final Comms team dinner and as we sat there, I looked around the table and realized that every single one of these people would be on the Ship next year. Except me. Wow. What a change from previous years. In Mada, I was the only one to still be there. In Benin, everyone left except myself, Michele and Tammy. And now everyone was staying and I was leaving. It’s the same with my group of friends – last year they all left, and I was the only one to stay. This year was a complete reset in terms of friendships. And this year, they are all staying. What a reversal. And yet, I still have absolutely no doubt that God is calling me home. Both our new Media Liaisons have been chosen and we’ve had the opportunity to train one of them over the last two months, so I know the job is well taken care of. God provided exactly who we needed to fill these roles and for that I am so thankful.

So other than all these goodbyes what have we been up to? Well we packed up our hospital and the dock, and we’ve been prepping for sail. The Ship leaves this weekend. We’ve been doing a lot of ‘lasts’: last time going to karaoke, last time going to the Indian place, last time at my favourite schwarma place, last time hosting local media (woo!), last time living in my 4 berth cabin (I moved into a single cabin!). That actually affected me more than I thought, saying goodbye to the bed that had been my home for the last two years.

Our Crater Lake group :)

We also had some new experiences. We had a big celebration for our Day Crew, to thank them for their all their hardwork and dedication. Of course, it turned into a big dance party until we said our final goodbyes on the dock. We also went on one final adventure – the crater lakes! This is a beautiful area with two large lakes created by volcanic craters. One of the lakes is sacred and only the village chief can swim in it (or something like that); but the other lake was fair game and it was delightfully cold! The whole hike was 9 hours, with about 2 hours’ worth of breaks; 18 miles and 453 flights of stairs. It was a majestic view, but I spent most of the time looking at the feet of the person in front of me. Rose and I had lots of laughs (mostly) bringing up the rear, as we focused on putting one foot in front of the other. On the way there we reached a part where you went almost straight down…climbing up on the way back was insane. We weren't quite sure we would make it! But we had nice friends who walked with us and set a manageable pace and talked to us to distract us and just encouraged us in general. We reached a small school building and I thought we were almost there, so I asked the guide how much longer? He said, 2 hours. My face dropped. That was a rough two hours. After that, every time I asked him, how long? He said it depended on how slow we walked…And to make our descent even more pleasant, it started pouring rain and everything turned into a mudslide. Thankfully, only Rose got to see me wipe out/lose my footing dozens of times. It’s a good thing that before we started, I told her I was sure-footed like a goat. Overall, it was quite an adventure and I’m thankful I got to do it with such remarkable people. The following day we went to visit the Ekom waterfall, although some of us (ie. me), could barely make it up and down the stairs. 

What a beautiful hike! PC: Kate Pitchford 

As soon as we arrived back to the Ship, it started… one by one we started to get very sick. I was first and was quickly followed by some others. Everyone else in the group was nervous, waiting to see who else would get sick. Apparently married couples are immune to whatever parasite/virus/illness we had. While being that sick was definitely no fun, I actually felt so loved through all of it because we were so well taken care of. Kate and a few other people brought us ginger ale and water and toast throughout the evening and the next day. I woke up and there was a bottle of Gatorade outside of my door. I was overwhelmed with gratefulness for this place and the servant hearted people who call it home. It was like having 5 moms J But thankfully we are all better now and ready to sail!

I know I sound very melancholy, but it’s only because I’ve been blessed to love and be loved well in this place, and I know I will miss that. But writing it all out and acknowledging the feelings is helpful, and at the end of the day I always rejoice, because our God is good and His ways are better than my ways. I would love your prayers for joy and peace during this time of transition, and for your grace with me as I deal with the mixed emotions of grieving the loss of this place but also being excited for home.

Give praise to the LORD, proclaim His name;

Make known among the nations what He has done.

Sing to Him, sing praise to Him;

tell of all His wonderful acts.

Glory in His Holy name;

let the hearts of those who seek the LORD rejoice.

Look to the LORD and His strength;

seek His face always.

~Psalm 105:1-4

These two beauties both got orthopaedic surgery to correct their bowed legs and now they can both run freely. Mariama &
Salamatou live right near the Crater Lakes where we were. This iconic shot was taken by the one and only Shawn Thompson ;)