A New Chapter

One of our beautiful plastics patients - thanks Ruben!

I have to start with the biggest piece of news I received recently – I was accepted to school (again)! In September I will be starting my Masters in Public and International Affairs at the University of Ottawa. I found out in the best way, while I was in the middle of skyping with my whole family. The first thing that came to mind was, God is faithful. Faithful to do what He promised. I know that getting into school had very little to do with me and my qualifications and that’s what makes it even more beautiful. I applied to one school and one program because I feel like this is where God has been leading me over the last year, putting this specific desire on my heart. And he accomplished it. I didn’t have the appropriate undergrad degree, I had the bare minimum grades to even apply, and yet, I was accepted. Being accepted suddenly makes going home very real. I had already made my decision, yet when you are on the Ship and hearing about all the needs for next year, and the friends who are staying, and there is no plan for what’s next, it’s easy to think about staying and what that would look like. Now that door is fully closed. But closing that door has opened many other doors. Having never lived in Ottawa as a Christian, there are a lot of unknowns about what life will look like (church, friends, work, living situation, etc.) but I know that God goes before me, just like He has during the last 3 and a half years.

A photo from our time in Edith's village.

I will return home at the end of June, but until then there is still lots happening in Cameroon! I temporarily took on a new ‘role’ – chauffeur. One of the families needed to go to Yaoundé to renew their passports so I offered to drive them. A friend from the orphanage in Benin had connected me to some missionaries he knew who were working in Cameroon for SIL International which is a Christian organization that does Bible translating. We were blessed to be able to go visit this family and hear their story. Both parents are pilots and help to fly the SIL planes. They are here with their 4 beautiful children. When I asked how long they planned to be in Cameroon (they arrived around the same time as the Ship), they said, oh probably 20-30 years. I was pretty amazed. I can’t imagine committing to something to that long…that’s more than the span of my whole life! It was encouraging to hear about how God has worked in their lives to get them to this point. It also helped that the dad is also a mechanic so he was able to help me out with the car which had been beeping at me for a while. We stayed in a nearby retreat center run by an older couple who has been in Cameroon for a long time. It was neat to see some of the other ways God is at work here in Cameroon. The day was spent driving from one place to the next, learning how to handle a manual car on steep hills (while having instructions translated from Portuguese) and seeing more of Yaoundé.

Some of our Canadian crew with the ambassador.

After hosting for two weeks straight, I had a two week break from hosting which happened to be exactly when the Olympics were on. It was fun to gather with people from all over the world and cheer on our respective countries (and talk trash about other people’s countries). A group of us got up at 5am to watch the Women’s Gold medal hockey game and that didn’t end so well…a heartbreaking loss, but in the end the Americans wanted it more. Even though we didn’t get any Gold medals in hockey, we did finish the Olympics with the most medals we’ve ever had, so we clearly have some amazing athletes in many other sports! During this time I also got to meet the Canadian Ambassador to Cameroon, a nice lady who was fairly new in her position and said it was her first time being the head of mission. It was interesting to hear her perspective on Cameroon compared to other countries she had served in. She also said that the Prime Minister of Cameroon had previously served as Cameroon’s ambassador to Canada for 20 years – maybe I should bring him some maple syrup. 

Larina and I in the kitchen window of our temporary 'home'.

We recently had a long weekend on the Ship and I purposefully planned a very non-Ship like weekend. A small group of us went to Kribi where we stayed in a small house with a fully equipped kitchen. We started the weekend off by going to the market and buying everything we needed, took our groceries home by moto, and then cooked our meals. It was funny to learn all the cultural differences that apply even to cooking (especially the high salt content!). We had access to a beautiful beach and spent a day exploring and walking along the beach, climbing the waterfall that is in Kribi, swimming and just enjoying God’s beautiful creation. Another interesting experience was discovering a movie theatre and going to watch Black Panther (the new Marvel movie). Turns out the movie was in French (oops, sorry friends), but the viewing experience was amazing with the audience cheering, clapping, heckling, and laughing constantly.

I’ve been very pushed and challenged lately, being presented with tangible opportunities to be more open and vulnerable. There are moments when I can feel it, feel God pushing me, saying Renee you can put your walls up or you can lean into this. There’s been moments of honest feedback, moments of admitting fears, moments of admitting that I have no idea what I’m doing, moments of sharing past life-changing events. And being open to feedback, truly open to being to what people say. And being incredibly surprised when what they say is how loved you are, how worthy you are. And realizing how much you needed to hear that. I’ve also had moments when I was so frustrated because I couldn’t remember how basic life outside the Ship worked and had to call my mom to be like, “I can’t put it on my credit card, it says 20% interest!?!”, only for her to be like, Renee…it’s 20% over a year, so around 1.6% a month. Ah…well that makes much more sense J Turns out needing people isn’t so bad when you have solid people all around you. 

The next few months will be fairly chaotic and it can be overwhelming to think about how it will all work out, but I'm living and loving one day at a time. Praying for the strength and patience to get through today. I’ll leave you with the words from a new I Am They song called Scars that really resonated with me:

Waking up to a new sunrise, looking back from the other side, I can see now with open eyes. Darkest water and deepest pain, I wouldn't trade it for anything, 'cause my brokenness brought me to you and these wounds are a story you'll use. So I'm thankful for the scars, 'cause without them I wouldn't know your heart, and I know they'll always tell of who you are, so forever I am thankful for the scars.

A shot from the roof of a building in Douala. The Ship is far in the distance.